Gossip: How God Hates the Strench

If you read the title and clicked away, HOLD YOUR HORSES JUST ONE SEC. If we were sitting in a small group and being completely honest, how many would say, “Hello, my name is ______ and I am a gossip.”? All of us, including yours truly, no matter how pulled together and pious we appear have fallen victim to opening our big mouths and shoving both feet in them, saying more than we know we should. Take a pause and do a self-check before we start. Are you one that likes to babble about others when they are not in the room? Do you do it unwittingly and even out of frustration? Deep in your heart, does it give you satisfaction to share a tidbit of information about someone (or someones) that people might not be aware of? Well, sisters and brothers (mostly sisters, let’s be real), here’s what the Bible has to say about it.

Proverbs 15:28 reads: “The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil.” Many times, gossip is spewed without a second thought. If you are a stranger to Proverbs, a simple synopsis is advice on wisdom vs. foolishness from a man that was gifted such wisdom from God. Unfortunately, opening your mouth without a second thought is incredibly foolish and even sinful. Think about that for a moment…seemingly harmless gossip is seen as evil in God’s eyes. “If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless.” –James 1:26. Marinate on that verse for a bit.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I have been the subject of gossip many a time and have overheard most of it. And don’t get me wrong, at times I gave them a reason to speak! At times, when I’m talking to family and friends, I have to listen to Holy Spirit and not say what I want, ask mouthwatering questions about things that are frankly none of my business, or even engage in listening to the conversation. And other times, I don’t listen to Him…but oh, the conviction to know that you’ve let down your greatest Helper and friend. My pastor often talks about the dangers of being a gossip, and I have to agree with him on the point that it makes people seem untrustworthy. If someone is always gossiping around you and you’re comfortably yucking it up with them, just know that in time you are bound to be the next topic of conversation. Blink, blink Trust me, I’m speaking from experience. Proverbs 20:19 reads: “Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with a simple babbler.”

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.”—Proverbs 18:21. How many of us remember the sting of an unkind word even if it were said years ago? Didn’t it feel as though your soul was being chipped away, causing you to shrink into yourself or crumble into a million tiny pieces? Perhaps this made you build a fort around your heart, making you appear falsely overconfident or greatly withdrawn. Maybe it caused you to hate people and want to live in the middle of nowhere so you didn’t have to deal with them. There are many studies out there that back up life and death being in the power of the tongue, one such study being that speaking to PLANTS (yes, the leafy green things in our backyard, you read it right) in a kind and encouraging manner makes them grow taller and stronger whereas the opposite can cause them to be stunted or wilt. If our words have such a great effect on plants, can you imagine the ramifications that they have on ourselves and others?

In Ephesians, Apostle Paul lays down the basic foundations of who we are in Christ and how we are to carry ourselves as children of the King. In chapter 4:29-30, it reads: “Do not let unwholesome [foul, profane, worthless, vulgar] words ever come out of your mouth, but only such speech as is good for building up others, according to the need and the occasion, so that it will be a blessing to those who hear [you speak]. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God [but seek to please Him], by whom you were sealed and marked [branded as God’s own] for the day of redemption [the final deliverance from the consequences of sin].” In the Body of Christ, we are meant to build others up with our words, not tear them down or worthlessly chatter about them. This even applies to our enemies (Matthew 5:44)! How do we expect others to know the love of Christ if we don’t walk it out?

Misrepresentation of the Word of God in action causes people to harden their hearts. Remember, we are ambassadors for Christ. This doesn’t mean that we will be perfect, as it is literally impossible, but we at least must pray about and ask Holy Spirit to help us to be conscious of our shortcomings and work towards Christlikeness. A mistake doesn’t make you, but a bad habit will walk you like a dog. A gossipy believer is as peculiar as the president of the D.A.R.E campaign lighting up a joint while giving a speech about how drugs are no good for your health. The hypocrisy therein dulls the effect of the message to those that are seeking truth.

We could never, ever live a life that is pleasing to God with our own strength and need to depend on the Lord to help us. He is on the other end of your rope, waiting for you to surrender and admit that you just don’t know how to move past certain struggles. That’s why He’s here; to help! Holy Spirit is the greatest person we will ever get to know because He will never lie to us. Ever. And it’s not always something that you would like to hear, it’s something that you NEED to hear. He doesn’t care about social norms or people pleasing like we humans do. Some people trying to be polite won’t even let you know that you’ve got lipstick on your teeth (guilty)! How could you not love the One that will not only tell you about yourself, but is willing and able to help you transform? We are meant to go from glory to glory!

Now, I say this in love as we have all been in this position, but may I share an observation with you? Many people that are constantly bringing up others to defame or to spread their business to anyone with ears often do so out of malice, boredom with their own lives, frustration, jealousy or wanting to make themselves look better (low self-esteem). Some people are addicted to stress and hold onto grudges like they were a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean, just waiting for opportunities to share the shortcomings of people in their lives or of their past. Others are obsessed with knowing everything about everyone and they kind of remind me of a porcupine with spines shooting out to protect themselves by diverting the attention to others who are seemingly lesser or more flawed than they are. Ugh...In my high school days and early adulthood, when I felt the lowest someone could possibly feel about themselves, my mouth was crazy, and I would laugh at others with my friends (some of whom made fun of me also… In fact, one of the friend groups I had spent more time gossiping about each other than we did actually hanging out!). We were cruel to others because we were miserable people! I thank God that in Christ “old things have passed away”!

Self-reflection is a very important component of a healthy minded human being. Wisdom comes from much prayer and self-evaluation. It is important to wonder why you did what you did or said what you said. Why do you constantly complain and gossip about others? It is v-i-t-a-l to do an honest self-check, not excusing your bad behavior, but asking God to reveal the root of it and get it out of there ASAP! Otherwise, you walk around with the word ‘FOOL’ branded on your forehead in big red letters. “He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.” -Proverbs 13:20.

If you’ve gotten this far, I really hope that this is a sobering reminder if you often gossip about others. As brothers and sisters in Christ, this is something that is just so very important and it’s been on my heart for months, but stronger in the last few weeks. The enemy will do everything in his power to divide and try to extinguish a move of God or what He’s doing through others. The Body of Christ is meant to be just that: a body. We need one another and it is never too late to be added into the fold. Think before you speak. Listen before you act. Don’t be afraid of not being a part of the action, we were set apart, after all! The next time a juicy tidbit crosses your path, just think ‘W.W.J.D?’.